Many of you know me as a sports guy, uh, NSU, I, I obsess about any kind of sport. I found myself sucked into the cornhole championships on ESPN the other day. Like, it, it's like that's the least exciting thing to watch someone throw a beanbag back and forth and I was like, oh yeah, like I was getting into it. Um, anyway, but besides sports, I actually do enjoy the theater a little bit as well and so enjoying the plays and if you enjoy, uh, going to productions, uh, for me, I, I, I think about, uh, the night I got engaged to my wife and right after our engagement, uh, we went and saw Phantom of the Opera, which is kind of fun. Now part of that was strategic, by the way, because my now wife told me that she wanted to be dressed up and have her nails done. But she also wanted to be surprised for the engagement and so I was trying to set up a situation where that was gonna happen. So that was the plan was, uh, we got, I gave her a Christmas gift which was tickets to Phantom of the Opera, so we got all dressed up and then I had a stage thing at a friend's house where we proposed. She said, yes, thankfully that would have been an awkward rest of the night. Um, and then we went to a celebratory dinner in the play, and so, uh, so I love a good play. I love character development, I love creativity and storyline and conflict, um, but what God gave me a thought, it's really not even part of the message today, it's really just a set up for this message is that as much as I love plays. I think that some people view the church gathering as a play. Right? And I get it. There's a stage, like there's microphones, there's lighting, there's rows. You guys came in. Although some of you came in a little bit late, just saying, you wouldn't do that to the play, like they like shut the door. Um, but, uh, maybe we should charge to, you know, OK, anyway, stop. Um, But I, I, I get it to where it's easy to view a church service like you would a play. But here's the thought God gave me here to set up is that the gathering is actually not the play. What this is right here, this is the staging area. And all of us collectively are cast members. And that we are rehearsing our lines, encouraging each other so that when we leave this place, we can go and actually present the good news of Jesus to the world that needs it, because here's the reality is that everyone in here is a part of the cast. And I say this because the stakes are high. Eternity is real, and our culture is watching and you've got a part to play. And so the goal is not simply to come in and sit and sing a song and go, oh that was nice, and go back and say, I'll see you at the next showing, but rather, can we collectively come together to encourage each other, to spur one another on, to pray with each other, to confess and to love and to be authentic. And real and to lift up a God who loves us so that we can go out as the cast, as the members to go and present the good news of Jesus to the world who needs it. And so the gatherings not to play. This is the staging area that right now you are backstage for what God is about to do this week. Amen. And so as we talk about relationships today. I want to encourage you. To understand this is not it. This is the encouragement that we can go out and live out the good news of Jesus and the love of Christ, to the people who are desperate to see and receive it. This morning's message is entitled Weatherproofing Love How to Survive Life's Storms. Because storms are happening. And I don't know, somewhere along the lines we've missed that as a church. I mean, you think, oh, if I pray to Jesus, then nothing bad will ever happen to me. The problem is that doesn't work. OK. There are 1,189 chapters in the Bible as we have it. I counted them. OK, or Google, one of the two. There are 1,189 chapters in the Bible as we have it. Do you know how many chapters are without conflict? 4 God creates the world. Genesis 1, this is Genesis 2, it is good. And by Genesis 3, we've messed it up. And the entire Bible, every single chapter. Involves a conflict, walking into one in the middle or expressing feelings about like in the Psalms or processing through. When Jesus comes into the world, guess what? Conflict. When the church starts, conflict, like everywhere you go, and it stays that way all the way until Revelation. 20 when Jesus comes back, like there's back and says, OK, enough is enough. The battle of Armageddon, that's not even a battle. He goes, and you're done. And Satan gets thrown into the lake of fire, and we have perfection, a new heaven on earth, and and we get to be face to face with the God who loves us in Revelation 21 and 22. So if there is conflict, In 0.0 or there's no conflict in 0 003. A third of 1% in the Bible. 99.7% of scripture deals with conflict. Why do we think as Christians, we're not gonna have storms? So the question is not, will you face a storm in your relationship? The question is, will you be ready for it? And so the goal of today is to give you the tools to take home. To weatherproof the relationships to be ready for the storms as they come. See, in week one, We began our study of 1 Corinthians 13, and we shared that love is more than a feeling, it's a foundation. And that relationship remodels are just like house remodels, they're messy. It's gonna involve some demolition a little bit. There's gonna be some construction, but in order for it to hold, you gotta have the foundation and build what's gonna last, right? Love is more than a feeling, it's a foundation. Then in week 2. We shared That really God's perfect love can empower our imperfect love. That as you read 1 Corinthians 13, the most commonly read passage at marriages, ceremonies and wedding ceremonies. That it is a picture of who Jesus is. So that before love becomes something that you do, it actually is a person that you meet. And when you read, love is patient and love is kind, you understand that Jesus is all those things. Once you meet and receive the love of Jesus, you can now reflect and share the love of Jesus with the people around you. And so today we're gonna continue building on our study of 1 Corinthians 13, the great love chapter, and give you the tools to understand how is it that we can apply this love in our relationships and beyond. And so if you're taking notes, I encourage you to write this down. Stop chasing love and start choosing love. Stop chasing love and start choosing love. We live in a culture that acts like love is some fleeting thing that you're trying to play tag with or hide and seek, or that you're just out in, in the world. Love, where are you, love? Right? Like you chase after this thing. It's like the Where's Waldo book. Like, uh, for the younger generations, books are paper things that we would open. Right? We didn't have apps. We had books with pictures where we could find one random dude in a red and white striped shirt. Right. And you have this picture, this crazy chaotic scene and you would try to find the guy. Where's Waldo? Right. I actually thought about this is how my brain works and this is weird, but I love audiobooks, uh, so I listen to audiobooks while I do house chores or work out or whatever. Um, I realized where's Waldo would not make a good audiobook. Right, he's like, man in yellow hat, tree, uh, garden tool, Waldo, like if you're like there he is, OK. Anyway, um, that's how my mind works. So we act though that love is something out there. you have to have more. You have to do more. You have to find perfect. We live in a world that this is constantly bombarding us with media messages. I don't know who the marketing geniuses behind perfume and cologne commercials are, but it always involves like somebody like an attractive male or female, like coming out of water, like with a gold plated thing. And it's like perfume, right? It's like, like as if like that's like I wanna see like a realistic cologne commercial, right? Like you hit the snooze button like you get up and there's like dirty laundry on the floor and like you're getting coffee and just drinking it and the kids are screaming in the background, you're like cologne. And the phrase is, good luck for another day, right? Like we have this thing, this picture like love is out there, you gotta find it. When in reality, It's not something you chase, it's something you choose. That when you receive the love of Christ into your life, It's not something you're chasing anymore, but it comes into your life, it changes your life, and now you can choose to love people the way that Jesus loved us. That's where transformation happens. We're gonna build on what we've been reading. So we're gonna start in 1 Corinthians 13, now we're gonna add verses 6 and 7 today. But it goes like this. If I speak in the tongues of men and angels, but I have not love, I'm a noisy gong or clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers and understand all mysteries and all knowledge and if I have all faith as to remove mountains, but I have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all that I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but I have not love, I gain nothing. And then it's gonna go into this list of 15 characteristics over 4 verses. He says and he personifies love again, he's describing Jesus. He's giving this picture of who God is. He says love is patient and kind. Love does not envy or boast. It is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way. It is not irritable or resentful. It does not rejoice at wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things. Personification of love. But these 15 characteristics don't just describe Jesus, they give us the tools. To remodel and work on our relationships. I'm not expecting you to memorize all 15 of these statements, so let's simplify it into 3 categories. These are 3 qualities of weatherproofing love. If you wanna have a relationship, it could be a marriage, couldn't be, it could be parent-child, it could be friendship, it could be working, you fill in the blank cause I'm guessing when we talk about tough relationships, there is a person that came to mind. OK When you think about these characteristics, we, we break them down into three qualities of weatherproofing love. And, and I just wanna, I just wanna offer a caveat here. That this is one of those eyes on your own paper kind of messages, right? We're heading into finals week for the middle school, high school students and, and it, and I say eyes on your own paper because have you ever listened to a sermon. And thought, oh yeah, they need to hear that. Right? Pastor makes a point, and you elbow the loved one next to you. Did you catch it? Did you catch it, huh? When you encourage your loved one with a sermon. Right? Hey, God really spoke, you need to listen to this. Right. Those are all good things. I'm, I'm not knocking that. But what I'm asking you to do is for the next 1520 minutes. Just ask God, what do you want me to get from this? And evaluate your relationships through what you bring to the table. Is there an area that you need to repent of? Is there an area that you need to reflect on? Is there something that needs to change? And it's so important for us to look at these qualities. But I want you to also be personal with it, but I also want you to be present tense with it. Because it can be tempting to listen to a message and point back and like, yeah, that person should know, hear this. And it can also be tempting to look back and like, man, I wish I would have done this 10 years ago. But the goal here is to find right where you are right now. And so you can start being equipped with the tools of scripture to navigate where God wants you to go. See, when you get directions on your phone or on Google Maps, you have to know where you are. Right? If I'm giving directions to a new restaurant in downtown Phoenix, does you no good to give you directions to that restaurant from Goodyear or from Gilbert or from somewhere other than where you are? So by having your eyes on your own paper for the next 1520 minutes to, to ask where you are presently, the hope here, the prayer here is that God can give you some tools to influence your relationship. Now, because here's, here's the reality, OK? Some of you are sitting on the other side of divorce. Some of you are sitting on the other side of betrayal, or brokenness, or hurt. Some of you have done some things that you regret, some of you are still dealing with consequences of choices that somebody else made. And so I don't want you to sit and think backward on what had happened, but I want you to process where God has you right now. Moving forward in these relationships, maybe there's reconciliation that's possible. Maybe there's a step you can take that's possible. Maybe the influence is now within your family, within your setting that you can bring hope and healing and humility into the relationships that you have right now. So you might not be able to go backwards. But you can bring the gospel with you into what's new. OK. Three qualities of weatherproofing love. Let's jump into it. Quality number 1. We see that weatherproofing love shows up. Weatherproofing love shows up. In those verses 4 and 5 are qualities that describe a person that shows up. Patience, kindness is not rude, does not envy, like there's a sweetness to it, right? Half the battles is simply showing up, even when things get tough. Um The focus of somebody showing up is humility. Showing up is easy when you get something. And showing up is easy when you, when you, when you, when you're gonna win something, or like, the question is, when you've messed up, when the other person's messed up, when there's questions and vagueness, and you're not sure where you are, are you willing to still show up then? Because in humility, then the feeling you have towards that person is compassion. With passion over and over again, Jesus is described as seeing a crowd, seeing the mixture, and what does he have? He has compassion on them. And when you have compassion, you can actually comfort somebody. Love shows up means that because and through humility and with compassion, you're gonna show up to bring comfort. It says this in Colossians 3:12 to 14. It says, put on then as God's chosen ones, right? Having three kiddos, it's, and the younger they are, the tougher it is, right? It's time to get dressed for school. Right? What do you need to put on? No, you cannot wear pajamas. No, you're not wearing the winter coat. But then when it's winter coat, no, you can't go in short shorts. Like, no, you can't go and whatever. And there's this, this struggle, right? Uh, when they're little, the struggle is just wear something, right? Put your shoes on, find it. When you're older, you're like, you're going to school and that, no, change, right? We're going and like, we're trying to find this balance. Well, here, we have this imagery of God through Paul telling us, here's what you need to put on every day. And guess what? You have to get dressed every day. Do you dress yourselves in these qualities every single day? And it's a very similar sounding list to what we read in 1 Corinthians 13. Here is the list. Holy and beloved. Again, you receive that first put on then compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another. And if one has complained against another, forgiving each other, as the Lord has forgiven you, so you must forgive. And above all else, put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. It brings it together. It brings it together, right? It is the secret sauce of the recipe. Right? If you've had a pasta, the key to a good pasta is, is that sauce, right? That brings all the flavors in. If you had a soup or a gumbo or something where it brings it all together. If you got something fried and you want to dip it in, right? Like you get like Chick fil A is nice, but Chick fil A sauce, oh, OK. Right, it's preparation for heaven. So there we go, like you're coming in, like you need the sauce. If you like barbecue, I'm cool with Texas or Memphis or Kansas City. Just put the right sauce on it and we're good to go, baby. Like, it's like, you need the sauce, like the love is the sauce in the relationship. Cause if you don't have it, what are the relationships? They're dry. They're flavorless. Like, I guess. Some of your relationships are like dry chicken. I guess it's needed to survive. Right? But when you have the loving relationship, right? Where so when you can come with vulnerability. And authenticity, you're approachable. Oh, the chef's kiss, right? The sauce is good. It's good. First Peter 47 and 8 says, the end of all things is at hand. That's encouraging. The end is coming. OK. Therefore, be self-controlled and sober minded for the sake of your prayers. That could be a whole another sermon, by the way, not time, but understand how you live actually does impact your prayers and vice versa, OK. But then notices verse 8, but above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins. Not only does it bring all things together, it covers a multitude of sin. For the golfers in the room with me, you understand that you drive for show, you putt for what? Put for dough. Why? Because. If you have a good drive and a good iron shot and you get on the green and you miss the putt, doesn't matter. I, I played high school golf. And when you play high school golf, there's a range of players you compete with. You play with guys one day who like they might make it on tour. You're like, this is amazing and so frustrating to play with. And then the next time you play around with a guy, you're like, how are you even on a team? Like, I think they were short and he just wanted a free bus ride to a golf course to play for free. And so this was one of those tournaments I was playing in in high school and I got paired up with a guy who just dressed out of, he was just a full on hippie, uh, looking to just say, um. OK, he was high. I'll just say that he was high, probably shouldn't say that in church, but he was. It, it's just being real with you, OK? And I say that because we get to the first screen, right? And he's out and he's like, hey, bro, like, uh, golf, like that does not fit with the country club mentality, right? And so here's this guy, he comes out and no joke, he pulls out a putt putt putter. Like, if you think about here, we had Cracker Jacks, right, the little rubber mallet. He pulled, I was like, bro, where did you get that from? He goes, from Captain Bogies. Like he had this neon. rubber mallet putter that he stole from a putt putt place in a sanctioned high school match. And I was like, this is gonna be a fun round. And so we go and back then you when you were putting on the green, you, you had to pull the pin because if you put it now it's allowed, but back then if you had the pin in and you make it on the green, that would be a stroke penalty. And so no joke, the pin was right here, it was in. He was like standing right here, so like a couple feet away, and he was about to putt. I was like, whoa, whoa, hey man, hey, do you want me to pull the pin? He goes, bro, I'm not gonna make it. And sure enough, it took him 4 putts from here and we moved on and all these years later, I still remember that. Why don't I say this, OK? Is that it's just like in golf putting matters, OK? Like how you love, how you treat someone is where the money is. That that that's the difference. OK, you make the money, you, you do the things I did boom, boom, boom, boom, and then you get in relationship with people and you don't love them. Like, you're missing the sauce, you're missing the pot, like you, you've missed the point. People are the point. And so it starts by showing up. But it doesn't stop there. The second quality to weatherproof your love. Is Love speaks up. Love speaks up. Now this one, to be honest with you, sneak, sneaks up on you. OK. So if you think about it, love is patient, love is kind. It's like, oh, it's a warm hug. OK. Which, by the way, what does that mean that you're probably not by default? Means by default, you're not patient, you're not kind. You are envious and you are rude. Like, if you don't, if, if you notice that like you don't see like social influencers or bloggers like writing and teaching people how to become resentful, right? Like, hey, here's 5 ways to become more impatient today. You're welcome. You don't need to be taught that, do you? Right. That's why this whole showing up thing is difficult and has to come through Christ. But he doesn't stop there, because then he goes in and there in verse 6, it almost seems like a complete contradiction. He turns and he says, it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. What does that mean? It means you have to confront. Mm, I don't like that one. It means while there is, it is loving to show up, it is also loving to speak up. Sometimes we think we're loving because we're not saying anything, but what we're actually doing is people pleasing. What we're actually doing is being selfish because what we do, here's, here's, here's the process. There's something that's wrong, there's a disconnect for the sake of love. I won't say anything. But really, it's because I don't know how they're gonna respond. And so by not saying anything, I'll sweep it under the rug, and I'll ignore it, but really I'm doing that so that you'll like me. So I'm actually not saying something for you. I'm actually not saying something for me. Cause I don't know how you're gonna respond and so I'm not gonna be honest or open with you. And so I'll just let it slide when really it's internal bitterness and by never say the truth. And so now there's this separation or this gap, and really, you're actually doing that for you. But there are other people, right, who love confronting. Yeah, Truth. Right? But how are we supposed to confront? OK. See, the focus of showing up is, is humility, right? You have a heart of compassion and so you comfort someone. The focus on speaking up is actually healing. Do you have the courage to confront? Are you speaking truth to tear somebody down or to build somebody up? See, here's how Scripture tells us to confront. Galatians 6:1. Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression. You who are spiritual should restore him, in a spirit of gentleness. It's not a gotcha. It's like, hey, I love you. And I want what's best for you. Here it is. Keep watch on yourself lest you too be tempted. Matthew 18. If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. If he doesn't listen, take one or two others along with you that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. In other words, like, are you, are you Are you coming alongside privately so that you can bring reconciliation or restoration? Or you building up an army of people and then just publicly tweeting something. For the sake of truth. Are you trying to prove that you're right? Are you trying to improve a relationship? Cause the purpose of confronting is actually healing. Like if you went to the doctor. And he just came out and said, Hey, surgery next Thursday. You wanna be like, cool. You would be like surgery for what? You have this. And so we have to respond with that. Confronting is understanding and recognizing and bringing into the light. What's broken or what's hurt. So that you can heal. There's pain in healing, by the way. In treatment in medicine, it's not easy. But Paul writes in Ephesians 4:15 and 16, he says, rather speaking the truth and love, right? You need truth and love. We are to grow up in every way into him who is the head into Christ, from whom the whole body joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love. The purpose of confronting is to grow. And then when you are confronted, how do you respond? David, when he was confronted by the prophet Nathan, after he committed murder and adultery and all these crazy things. His response in Psalm 51, and Chris, you read the whole chapter, but he says these words in verse 10 through 12, he says, create in me a clean heart, O God. Renew a right spirit within me. Cast me not away from your presence and take me not your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation and uphold me with a willing spirit. Conflict is inevitable. If scripture is filled with 99.7% of conflict. Your lives is gonna be dealing with that as well. And while conflict is inevitable, growth is optional. I think we all know somebody who's been having the same argument for decades or resentment, right? They've been reliving the same situation over and they never grow, they never move past, they never walk through. So conflict is inevitable, but growth is optional and you can choose to grow when you choose to love. How do you love? First, weatherproofing love involves showing up. Through humility and the feeling of compassion, can you comfort somebody even when it's difficult. But second, To have weatherproofing love, love speaks up. For the purpose of healing, do you have the courage to confront, not knowing how they're gonna respond? But to do so with vulnerability, with honesty, right? Being authentic. For the purpose of restoration. And finally Weatherproofing love. Stays Stays That last verse, love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. It's not this ignorant, like obliviousness, like this like happy, well, whatever. It's more like like a gritty been through war. Optimism. And that's why that song is hitting a, a core with our society today, the Brandon Lake and and and Jelly roll, the hard fought hallelujah piece. It's this idea of been through hell, kind of grittiness, but I hang on. And it's because you believe. In Jesus, that it gives you the strength to fight for what matters most. See, the mindset of showing up is humility, like I'm hurting but I'm gonna show up. Right. The mindset of speaking up is, is really. One of healing, right? I want to restore what's broken. The mindset of a commitment to stay is hope. Because when you have hope. It gives you the conviction to commit and say, I'm not going anywhere. Right? When you're standing like this, kind of inward on yourself, like you can be pushed over pretty easily. But when you got 1 ft in front of the other, there's this stable base that comes and say, I'm not going anywhere. But our hope doesn't come from ourselves. It comes through Jesus. See his half brother James wrote this in a letter to the church in James 1:12. He says, blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial. For when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life which God has promised to those who love him. There are people on one side of the equation that may have given up hope, but you can say not me, not today. I got knocked down But I'm not staying down. We read this in Romans 8. Starting in verse 24, it says, for in this we hope we were for in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience. Likewise, the spirit helps us in our weakness, for we do not know what we pray as we ought, but the spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. Have you ever been so broken, so lost, so low that you don't even know what to say anymore? Do you understand that in your lowest possible moment, God is still there? That he says, when you don't have anything left to say to God, I'll speak for you. You don't have to hold on to anything because I'm holding on to you and I came down, how far will God go for you? He came from eternity and perfection in heaven to the reality and the limitations of earth lived a perfect life, and yet in that perfection was killed by the people he came to save, went down to the depths of hell, risen to conquer death and set us free. That if God can go that far, then I'm telling you there is hope for every relationship. Amen. That even when you don't know what to say, God says, and I'll say it. That even when you feel lost and you're like, how did I get here? How I, I should be farther, I should be more mature, I should be this and like, you're here now and guess what, so am I. So don't give up. Don't give up Commit to stay with this grittiness that comes from who God is and what God has done, because it says this then in verse 27, and he who searches hearts knows what is in the mind of the spirit because the spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. It says, and we know that for those who love God, all things work together for good. For those who are called according to his purpose. That if it's not good yet, God's not done. He doesn't say that all things are good. In fact, all of scripture is filled with storm after storm after storm after storm, and that in the middle of it, in the middle of the mess, in the middle of the struggle, God is still there. So as believers. We are called Just stop chasing love and start choosing it. So I wanna ask you That the person that came to your mind today. Over and over during this message. Let me ask you That empowered by Jesus, in what area do you need to choose love? Do you need to show up? Out of fear for being hurt, Have you walked away? Have you put up a maybe some of you have been there physically, but you're checked out emotionally and mentally. Being physically in a space with someone else doesn't mean that you're emotionally and mentally present. Are you willing to show up? To comfort Maybe you need to speak up. And for the purpose of healing, you need to confront. Uh, John, I don't know what they're gonna say. I don't know what's gonna happen. Like, that's what you gotta trust. That's what we say because I love you, I need to share this. I need to love with truth, and I need to speak truth in love. And then finally, if you've been through battles, if you've been through it. Are you willing To commit to stay. Like, OK, John, but I've been through brokenness. OK, yeah, you can't go backwards. But with the people in your life where you are now and everything here, are you gonna have this gritty optimism that says if God And conquer death, there is still hope for me today, and it's in that hope. I'm gonna believe. The other person might not believe, but I'm gonna believe. And I'm gonna hang on to hope. And whatever that area is. I pray that you would take a step in that direction to show up. To speak up And commit to stay. For the glory of God, will you pray with me, dear heavenly Father. Help us to choose love. That in the messiness of our situation and our relationships, the battles and struggles that we have, I pray. That we don't have to chase anything but rather we can receive it from you. And God help us to love you more every single day. And that as we bless you with our worship with our words, with our service. Can we turn around God and love people the way that you have loved us. God help us to show up where we need to. Help us to speak up where we need to. And help us to stay committed to the people and the things you've called us to stay committed to. In our heart and our brokenness, we bring it to you and in your perfection you love through us you bring healing you bring hope that we can turn around and love people the way that you've loved us. We lift our relationships up to you and your son's name we pray. Amen.