Well, today's message is geared for everybody. But for those graduates, I really
wanna tailor this also for you as well because I think it's gonna be so
important as you move into this new season of life. And I came across this study
recently from the America Survey Center and they did a research study in 2021 to
see if the pandemic impacted relationships and friendships. And what they found
was actually deeper information that goes well beyond just the effects of a
pandemic on our relationships. And so they used questions from 30 years ago and
so they used the same questions from 1990. And that's crazy to me that 1990 was
30 years ago. I didn't feel like that and, and they asked people questions about
their friendships and then they asked the same questions now in 2021 and the
numbers that came back were pretty staggering. And that is overall, the number
of friendships and relationships that people have today is dramatically
decreasing. And it sounds crazy, right? That we live in a world where connection
has never been easier with the technology and things that we have available to
us. But at the same time, the number of healthy close relationships is on a
massive 30 year decline. See, in 1990 when they ask people about how many close
friends you have, and I'll let you decide what a close friend counts as. But 27%
of people who answered in 1990 said that they have three or fewer close friends.
But what's interesting is that 33% actually answer that they have 10 or more
close friends. Now, we go to the 2021 version of that same study and 49% of
people said they have three or fewer friends, close friends and of those who
said they have 10 or more close friends, only 13%. So the number of people who
have three or fewer friends almost doubled and the number of people that have 10
or more close friends actually went down by about 60%. Why is this happening?
Well, I think there are two reasons, there's more than two, but two that I wanna
focus on today. And the first one here is that I think we live in an age where
we really celebrate self sufficiency and that we love to, to be on our own, to
be self reliant, to be able to get what we want when we want. We want our, our
TV shows and our movies immediately. We want it instantly. We wanna order things
through prime and have it delivered. Within the hour. We want our food
delivered, we want everything delivered like we want it, we want what we want,
how we want it, individ individualized and customized for us right now. And that
we don't need anything from anybody. But the basis of relationship and
friendship is admitting that you have a need, you know, when you think about,
um, you know, the movie, um, uh, the classic movie where they say I have a need
for what speed? Ok. And so it's a great movie and a great line. But here's the
thing you could have just simply stopped that I have a need because that's
really what relationships are about. It's about admitting that you have a need
and we don't like to do that as Americans anymore. We don't like to admit or
open up or be vulnerable. And then another thing that I think is interesting
that is compounding the effects is that we live in a very divisive world now,
whether you take politics or other issues that you throw it out there, that it
seems way more divisive than ever. And then if you disagree with me, then I
can't be friends with you with that. It really doesn't have to be the case. And
so here we are in an age filled with technology and filled with opportunity and
yet we're more isolated and overwhelmed and anxious than ever before. And so as
we continue our series soundtracks, we are in week four of this study and we
defined a soundtrack as a thought that often gets repeated in our minds just
like a good song or maybe even a bad song gets stuck on our head and we just
keep singing the lyrics over and over or humming the tune. There are thought
patterns, both positive and negative that get repeated in our minds. And in week
one of our study, we talked about how we have the opportunity to proof your
playlist. You might not have put the thought in there. You might not have put
the song in your playlist, but you get the opportunity to edit and proof the
playlist and decide what stays there. And then in week two, we looked at the
category of our work life. And we shared from the very beginning of creation
that your work matters to God and therefore God should matter and influence your
work. And then last week, we talked about family dynamics about how life can
feel unscripted, but that our parenting can actually be intentional. And so
today we focus on our friendships and our relationships with a message entitled
Friends and Future. You might have heard the saying before that if you show me
your friends, I can tell you your future and studies actually show that for the
most part, you are the average of your five closest relationships that means
health wise, financially, spiritually, emotionally, physically. That if if you
look at the accumulation of your closest relationships, chances are that you
will be a reflection of those relationships. And so I believe that to be true
that if you show me your friends that I can tell you or predict your future, and
so our relationships really matter to God. And so we wanna try to offer you a
better soundtrack because the world and, and Satan himself will try to give you
a broken soundtrack and tell you things like you're never good enough. People
won't accept you, they won't like you, but we wanna retire those broken
soundtracks. We wanna replace them with biblical ones and then allow you to put
them on repeat enough to where you start to live out what God says when it comes
to our relationships. And so if you're taking notes, I want you to write this
down today that when it comes to friends and relationships, good friends carry
burdens and they cultivate blessings, good friends, great friends even carry
burdens and cultivate blessings. We're really gonna focus in and zoom in on
those two concepts of burdens and blessings. And we're gonna land. If you have
your Bibles open up to Galatians chapter six, we're gonna end up at verses 1 to
10, but I wanna give a little runway or lead way to understand how we get to.
Chapter six. Paul is writing the Apostle Paul who was a complete antagonist of
Christianity as a radical salvation experience. Now, is preaching and planting
churches. And he writes to this group of churches, house churches in around
Galatia. And there is these religious um guys who are trying to have Jesus plus
rules and regulations. So they, they had old rules and regulations that they
followed. They get saved and now they're trying to practice this Christian
faith, but they want to keep all the rules and regulations from before and
they're trying to enforce those on people. And Paul is gonna come in and you're
gonna see this here that, that really, he focuses on Christianity and he focuses
on four things. It, it's about Jesus, it's about our faith and belief in Jesus.
Then it, which leads to our love for other people and all of that is done in his
spirit. So you have Jesus Christ, what he did that leads to our faith in Him,
which then allows us to love others and all of it is done in the power of the
Holy Spirit. And then he gets real practical at the end of his letter. And so in
Galatians chapter two, verse 20 Paul writes, he says, I am crucified with Christ
and it is no longer I who live but Christ who lives in me. So it starts about,
it starts with Christ. And then in chapter three verse five, he says, does God,
he who supplies the spirit to you and works miracles among you do that by works
of the law. Or by hearing with faith. In other words, you get saved by what you
did or do you get saved by believing what Jesus did. And then he, we don't have
time to dive into it. But he actually uses an old Testament example. It says
it's not about the law, it's not about uh the 10 commandments that it predates
that. And he uses the example of Abraham who lived 400 years before Moses in the
10 commandments and says, Abraham was blessed because of his faith. So it's
always been about faith from the beginning and salvation is about believing.
It's about faith in Jesus. And then he says in here in Galatians 51, it says for
freedom, Christ has set us free, stand firm therefore and do not submit again to
the yoke of slavery. It's not about a list of rules. It's about a relationship
with the God who saved you. And then he says in a couple of verses later in
Galatians 56, it says for you or call or it says for in Christ, Jesus, neither
circumcision or uncircumcision counts for anything but only faith working
through love. And this, it really is the great commandment to love the Lord,
your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength, to believe that fully and
then to love others as he has loved us. So beyond just loving your neighbor as
yourself Jesus. Actually in John 613 says, actually, you're gonna step further
and says that you are to love one another as I have loved you. So it's faith and
love. And he repeats this idea in verse 13, he says, for you are called to
freedom. Brothers only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh.
In other words, don't use that license to do whatever you want. He says, but
through love serve one another. So it's not that we have a freedom to sin. It's
actually that we have a freedom to serve. If you wanna show people that you are
truly free in Christ, you will show that with how you love and serve one
another. This means that your relationship with God being a Christian and
maturity is not about not sinning, but instead about how you receive and how you
give love. And are you becoming more loving as Jesus does? And then he gives an
example and one of the greatest passages we have in the Bible about what it
means to be filled with the Holy Spirit. He actually describes the fruit of the
Spirit in verse 22. And then also shares this in verse 25 as well. He says, but
the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness,
faithfulness, gentleness, and self control. He says, if we live by the spirit,
then let us also keep in step with the spirit. So all over the letter we see
it's about Jesus and what he did for us, that we have faith in him and our faith
in him leads us to love other people as Jesus did. And we can't do that on our
own strength, but only through the power of the Holy Spirit. And now we get to
the end of his letter in chapter six and he's going to get super personal and
super practical and he's going to say this is why it matters in our
relationships in graduates. I wanna tell you here that when you go into this
next season that you're gonna need the right people next to you and you're gonna
need to be the right kind of person for those people that you cannot and will
not be able to go through life alone. And so to set up the passage that we're
studying today, it really breaks down into two categories. Galatians chapter six
verses one through five talks about burdens and then verses six through 10 talks
about blessings. Again, our main idea is that good friends carry burdens and
then cultivate blessings. And so we see both sides so in tough times and then at
all times. So let's dive in and see what Paul writes to us today. So Galatians
chapter six verse one, it says brothers, if any is caught in any transgression,
you who are spiritual, should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Now notice
the tone and have you ever gotten in trouble for not just what you said, but how
you said it, your tone matters, doesn't it notice the gentleness here? He says,
if anyone is caught in any transgression, in other words, you can end up in a
place where you didn't intend to go. You might have made some bad choices, but
you can admit that you didn't mean to end up where you ended up, right? You can
make a wrong turn. Like man, how did I get here? And he sees that and then he
says, then you who are spiritual, it doesn't say you who are better but you who
are spiritual, who are walking in the spirit. It says restore him. That word
restore is actually used in the gospel of Mark to describe the mending of nets.
Fishermen would mend their nets. And so there's this gentle, correcting and
fixing so it can work properly. That's the same word here in other places that
word restore is used as a medical term like a doctor like Luke who wrote the
Gospel. Luke. There would use to describe someone who a doctor who is fixing a
broken bone that if something is broken, you wanna restore it to its original
purpose in the same way. A good friend reaches out to someone in the spirit of
gentleness, not a ah got you or I'm better than you, but instead to come
alongside someone and say, hey, here's what the word says. Here's what's
possible. Let me help mend, let me help, come alongside you to restore you to
God's original purpose for your life. And it says, but then keep watch of
yourself, lest you two be tempted. So, yes, Jesus was a friend of sinners. Jesus
befriended tax collectors and many others. But just because you're a friend of
sinners doesn't mean that you join them in their sin and that your closest
relationships, you invest in those and those matter. And it says in verse two,
bear one another's burdens and so fulfill the law of Christ. What is the law of
Christ? Well, it's summed up in what we talked about to love the Lord, your God
with all your heart, soul, mind and strength to have faith in him and then to
love others as Jesus loved us. So that when you bear one other's burdens, that
word burden here is bear us, which means to carry a heavy burden. And that's
important because a similar word for burden or load is used in verse five, but
it's actually a completely different term. And so I'm not necessarily promoting
the show, but if you are a pagan heathen and you've enjoyed the show, Friends,
you may have seen an episode where a gentleman was carrying a couch upstairs and
needed help and they got stuck and he was like pivot. All right. And he's
getting stuck, right? And he needs someone to help carry some heavy furniture up
the stairs. All of us have some type of situational, emotional relational couch,
that's too heavy for us to carry. All of us have a circumstance or situation
that we need somebody else to help carry the weight or share the weight with us.
That word for uh burdens in this verse is also used to describe the Pharisees
and the gospel, except in not in that passage. It was said, oh, Pharisees, you
place heavy burdens on people. In other words, you place heavy expectations that
they cannot meet. So sometimes our burdens are situational or relational or
emotional or financial things that we cannot carry on our own. Sometimes there
are expectations placed on by other people. But whatever situation you're
walking through, we called as Christians as a good friend to then carry that
burden to share that weight with someone else. And then it says for verse three,
for if anyone thinks he is something when he is nothing, he deceives himself.
That's a great verse. So if you just have somebody in your life that uh just
irks you just that jerk, you know, you can just be like, hey, I was having some
quiet time. I read Galatians chapter six verse three and thought of you today.
You know, if someone doesn't read their Bible, you can just get them like an
engraved mug or something with Galatians 63. Hey, this is you, God loves you.
There's a verse, right? And so this is, we're gonna dive more into that verse in
a little bit. So hang on to that verse. But then in verse four, it says here,
let, but let each one test his own work and then his reason to boast will be in
himself alone and not in his neighbor. We're gonna explain that in a moment. But
then he gets to verse five and he says, for each will have to bear his own load
or his own burden. See the word in verse five is actually different. That word
is ft which means to carry your own pack. If you think about a soldier that's
going into a war that each one has to carry their own pack when you go through
or a group of people are hiking, you have to carry your own supplies. This is
very different because in verse two, the word for burden and load actually means
to help someone else. The word in verse five is to be accountable to God. Modern
translation, keep your eyes on your own paper, keep your eyes on your own test,
right? You're, you're walking through the life, walking through life, you're
facing a test. You can't be like, oh, what do they have? Oh, what do they have?
And I love this tension because if you think about it, we can find ourselves in
one of two camps on one side. There's a, well, not my problem. That would be
this half of the room. Ok. But then on this side, out of empathy and sympathy,
you make everyone's problem, your problem. You know, I'm talking like, oh and
you're just like, broken about everything everywhere and you're like, oh man, I
can't or you enable someone and like, and we struggle and so so both have good
intentions. But Paul comes in the middle and says it's a both and not either or
so we can carry the burdens of others, Share the weight, help them. But then at
the same time, you have to take responsibility for yourself. You might not be
able to control what has happened to you, but you do get to control your daily
actions and response. And so yes, seek the help that you need. Look for things
that you can do, but then it matters, it changes things, doesn't it? So here in
these first couple of verses, when it comes to handling burdens in difficult
times, tough times, what we find is that in tough times, good friends do three
things. Number one, good friends look to restore good friends, look to restore,
to mend the nets, to fix the broken bone in a spirit of gentleness. That's
accountability. A long time professor at Dallas Seminary Howard Hendricks to a
lot of uh and taught a lot of the pastors and churches all over the country for
for decades. And uh once he gave a sermon and talked about how it's gonna be
difficult for pastors to have friends. And then he came back later and actually
said, no, it is essential for pastors to have friends. Because as a, a major
professor at a major seminary, he would do a lot of counseling. And he said, one
of the most common characteristics of people who have a major failure of some
kind is the lack of accountability in close friendships is that when you're
isolated and alone that can lead to dark things. So it's important for us to
look for accountability and the and to gently restore the ones we love. And it's
hard to restore and hold people accountable if you don't know them and if they
don't know you right? Do you allow people in and do you get close enough to
where you can have some accountability? Look to restore? The second thing that
tough and tough times good friends do is that they lift to reinforce, they live
to reinforce. This is encouragement to share the weight that looks too heavy for
you. Let me come and help. That could be a text message that could be a meal. I
could be babysitting kiddos. That could just be a phone call. I, and what I
found is the heavier, the burden, the less you have to say, the less there is to
say. So sometimes it's just being present, being there. Hey, I'm thinking of you
and praying for you. What do you need? What can I do? How can I help do we live
to reinforce, to carry some of that weight? But then the third thing here is
that we have to live to represent that's responsibility, that's responsibility
that we have to take responsibility for our own actions. Now, I shared earlier
when we read that passage about the value of verse three and verse four in
Galatians chapter six, and I think those verses are put in there because they
share with us the top two barriers to relationships. You ready? The first
barrier to a healthy relationship is pride because he wrote in there, he said,
if anyone thinks he's something, when he's nothing, he deceives himself, the
number one barrier to healthy relationships is pride. And then the second
biggest barrier to healthy relationships described in verse four of Galatians
six is comparison. He says, let each one test his own work. We have to stop
comparing our families, our finances, our friendship, relationships with what
the world says because we live in an area where you're always competing and
either you feel better than someone else or you feel not worthy of other people.
And Paul is coming in to say that it's not about that, that if you put aside
your pride, if you put aside comparison, it allows you to lift up the burdens of
the people around you and then to take responsibility for your own own choices.
And so what do good friends do in tough times? They look to restore they live to
reinforce and then they live to represent, to represent the God who saved them
and to represent to the world why they do what they do and who they are as
Children of God. So we've addressed the burdens. But let's move to the all
seasons category verses 6 to 10. When it talks about how can we be a blessing?
Verse six, let the one who has taught the word, share all good things with the
one who teaches, there's a generosity there. Now, in this particular case, he's
talking about resources within the church body. And so can you describe yourself
as someone who shares with your resources, someone who is generous within the
church with each other? There's give and take back and forth, humbly, giving and
serving one another and freedom. So there is a sharing of resources and a heart
of generosity behind this verse seven says, but do not be deceived. God is not
mocked for whatever one sows. He will also reap verse eight for the one who sows
to his own flesh will from his flesh reap corruption. But the one who sows to
the spirit will from the spirit reap eternal life. And it had just described the
fruit of the spirit. And then it says in verse nine, and let us not grow weary
of doing good for in due season, we will reap if we do not give up that word for
in due season. In due time is Kairos, which means God's appointed season or time
saying, don't give up if you are doing good, do not give up. Because in God's
timing, you'll see the harvest that you've been praying for. So then as we have
the opportunity, let us do good to everyone and especially to those who are of
the household of faith. So verses one through five, we see what it means to
carry burdens. But in these verses, verses six through 10, we, we learn what it
means to be a blessing at all times. So in all seasons, at all times, good
friends do these three things. Number one, they share. That's our treasure. The
Bible says in the gospel of Jesus says, where your treasure is there, your heart
will be also. So then I ask you, where is your heart? Do you have a spirit of
generosity? Do you share your resources within the church to the church? But
with the church and with each other, can you describe yourself and your attitude
as one of being generous? That's our treasure. But the second thing that good
friends do is that they sew, they sew. That's our, our talents and our gifts and
our abilities. Here's an interesting thing and it sounds so simple, but it
really is profound. You will never grow what you do, not sow, you will never
grow what you do not sow. I I'm not saying that growth happens easily. I'm not
saying that things don't come and restrict your growth. But I can promise you
this, that you will never grow what you do not sow. I will never have apple
trees in my backyard. You know why I've never planted apple seeds anywhere. Like
I've never thought like some of it. Here's what's interesting though. Some of
you want that you want the growth in an area of your life that you've never
planted, you want a healthy physical body, but you've never sowed that, right?
Your heart says whole foods, but your pantry says mcdonald's. You know what I
mean? You know what I'm saying? Like here, like we've never made you like,
what's your routine like, oh, I wanna be physically fit. When are you working
out? Oh, I don't know. I, I thought I was like gifting, the thought that counts,
you know, OK, we take this to parenting and your relationships, man. I want the
best marriage. What are you sowing? I want the best kids. What, what are you
doing to invest in them? I want the best relationships, the best friendships.
What are you doing? What seeds are you planting? You will not grow what you do?
Not first sow. And so the encouragement is to start by sowing today in the
relationships that you want to cultivate and grow. And the last thing here is an
encouragement to us and that is to serve because that's our time. So I love like
Paul is so intense in this letter. But he pauses to offer encouragement. He
says, look, and if you have been sewing, stay faithful, don't give up serve,
continue doing good. Because in God's time and God's moment, I promise you, you
will see fruit, you will see response and maybe you don't even see that to till
eternity. But in God's time and God's way, it'll be worth it. So do not give up.
So when you look at your relationships, can you honestly say that you share of
your treasure, that you are sowing your talents and gifts and abilities
investing and what you're called to do and the people around you and then are
you serving with your time? Right? Because that's what relationships take. They
take treasure, talent time. You need to invest in those because healthy
relationships, good friendships, good friends, they carry burdens and they
cultivate blessing. And as we're wrapping up, I want to challenge you with this.
It's very easy to listen to a message like this and to begin to replay in your
mind, some broken soundtracks or broken relationships of the past like that
person, they did that they did this thing and we tend to focus on others. But
what I want to challenge you and encourage you to do today is that don't walk
out of your focus on what other people have or haven't done to you or with you.
But instead the challenge is to be this because if you want healthy
relationships and friendships, it starts with your choice to be this right now
right here. Are you willing to start sowing better seeds? Graduates as you go
into this new season? Are you gonna make commitments to your relationships
because your relationships matter, show me your friends. I can tell you your
future. You know how I know God values friendship because Jesus in John 15
looked at his disciples who he knew was gonna doubt deny tray these imperfect
people in a conversation he had right before he was gonna go to the cross. He
looked at them and he says, I call you friends. So can you carry someone's
burden today? Can you cultivate a blessing? Can you fulfill the law of Christ to
have faith in Him? Believe in who Christ is and what God has done and through
the power of the Holy Spirit, go and love people the way that Jesus did. Because
if you can cultivate those relationships, if you can invest in them, it changes
everything. Let's pray dear heavenly Father. We thank you for the value of
friendships. God help us to carry the burdens of those around. I don't know what
the emotional relational or situational couch or piece of furniture that's too
heavy for someone to carry right now. But when we come alongside and lift up
those people around us and then at the same time, God may we carry our pack,
will we carry our load and take responsibility for our own choices and actions.
But then we can share of our resources that we can sew and invest and plant our
abilities and gifts and passions to, to use our freedom to invest our time to
serve one another with honor and with love. And at the end of the day, Jesus, we
just long to have healthy relationships that reflect a relationship in you. We
give up our friendships and our community and our church family to you. Now,
it's in your son's name. We pray. Amen.